Saturday, September 29, 2007

The Dome Reclamation Project

Chef announces small, but important steps toward reclaiming tainted sections of the Superdome this afternoon.

Chef began by unearthing several sacred Cafe 641 items from the 2006 season in his attic last night . . . the infamous Forty-Niner Fruitcake, which doesn't last as long as Aunt Sally's does when stored in an attic for six months . . . P-Diddy's Bacchus-thrown Junkyard Dog Black and Gold beads . . . Mojo's custom crafted fleur-de-lis bead from the Philly playoff win . . . an oversized black and gold spoon and ladle set gifted to Chef from the Cafe faithful.

Then, braving early morning sunshine, Chef mixed an extra large Absolut screwdriver and snuck into the Dome in civilian attire, hidden among the LSU/Tulane fans. While the rest of the Superdome grew silent during Tulane's spirited, but short-lived first-half rally, Chef climbed to the top of the Upper Terrace. Finding his Cafe empty, Chef began a labyrinth-like walk through each row, stopping at every seat to utter the Who Dat Profession of Faith.

"I believe in the spirit of the Who Dat. I profess my Who Dat faith. I will return to these roof-banging seats on October 7. I will wave my golden spoon. I will be loud. I will stay for 4 quarters. I believe in saving my gameday appetite for Cafe 641. I break bread with my Upper Terrace family. I feast on Birds -- clean or dirty, black, green or red; Cats -- big and small; Pirates; the city of Houston; Gold Diggers, and the swollen haunches of the grizzly bear."

Stopping only to step over a broken spoon in Row 41, Chef continued his rounds to the top of the Cafe. And then, fatigued by the burden of his labor, Chef entered the Cafe 641 men's room, where a smoldering cigarette miraculously remained from five nights earlier. Chef picked the Cafe token from the ground, examined it closely for germs, and took its final drag.

As he dropped it into the urinal, Chef looked curiously upward to discover a cloud of smoke hovering around his head. And Chef be damned if he didn't notice the faint, cumulous tinge of a fleur-de-lis formation.
Earn it. Reclaim it.

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