Tuesday, July 31, 2007


Funny how Coach grabbed the first shirt he saw in the locker room before meeting the press the night before training camp opened in Jackson, MS. Chef uses the same approach to select culinary utensils, cooking undergarments, and mustaches, but never with the stellar results that P-Diddy unveiled.


Chef thinks this slogan is a little easy, a little too obvious for the complex machine that is buried inside Payton's melon. But, in yet another sign that Sean Payton is a genius, he offers up a one-size-fits-all slogan for every Who Dat in every section of the Dome.

Cafe 641. EARN IT.

Chef's table. Rows 40-43, Section 641. EARN IT.

Spoonworthy Who Dats. EARN IT.

Chef announces new guidlines as regards the 2007 issuing of Golden Spoons:
1. EARN IT. four quarters, not three.
2. EARN IT. Cafe 641 is a restaurant cooperative, owned and operated by the asses populating Upper Terrace, Section 641. Gameday menu suggestions are not appreciated. They are required.
3. EARN IT. Cafe 641 has a no sitting, no silence policy during opposing team's offensive drives.
4. EARN IT. "Deuce upside your head, I said Deuce upside your head. . ." New chants, cheers, and dance moves -- once adopted by the 641 populace -- are instantly spoonworthy.
5. EARN IT. Nacho Libre didn't earn a spoon by wearing a coaching visor and a 1984 Saints sweater vest. Two words: red tights. Who Dat costuming is so money.
6. EARN IT. Everybody has a day job. (Okay. Sorry Mr. Benson-LeBlanc, almost everyone.) But, after the biggest wins -- Monday Night Football . . . punt returns for game-winning touchdowns . . . playoff miracles -- there is very little excuse to proceed home. Cafe 641 is a movable feast. The more midnight you burn, the more spoons you earn.
So, thanks again Sean "Puffy" Payton -- or whoever is responsible for this simple slogan. Cafe 641 will take it from here.

(consider it done. thanks saintseester for the graphic -- she's been spoonworthy for some time now.)

Saturday, July 28, 2007

Expect More

Chef just learned that Cool Brees spent part of his offseason enrolled in FRE FLO DO motivational thought and speaking seminars, after Reggie Bush suggested that the training may improve his already lofty leadership skills.

(Apparently, the offer came after Drew politely refused Reggie's initial gift of an Elite 360 Xbox).

After two intensive weeks of mental training with Kappel LeRoy Clarke, Drew was asked to convert the sacred tenets of FRE FLO DO philosophy to gameday quotes. See the results yourself by comparing the FRE FLO DO mantra with Cool Brees' recent statements:

The FRĒ FLŌ DŌ® Experience is synonymous with conquering fears by facing them, understanding them, then transcending them with a lifelong commitment to total personal growth. The challenge of the FRĒ FLŌ DŌ® Student is to develop and practice a mental and physical ‘state of readiness’ so that positive responses to uncomfortable situations become so intuitive and fluid that from thought to action he or she exhibits a sort of human manifestation of flowing water!

"Just because we finished where we did last year, it doesn't mean that anything is going to be given to us. I think we even have to go out and work harder. Once you taste that level of success, human nature is to just relax.

But in our case, we're trying to TAKE THINGS TO THE NEXT LEVEL. We fell a game short of our ultimate goal last year. Our ultimate goal was not to make it to the NFC championship. It was to win the Super Bowl.

So that is our No. 1 priority, our No. 1 goal.





We're where we are because we worked extremely hard to get here. But there's still another level. Let's work extremely hard to get there."

Wednesday, July 25, 2007

Gleason Injury Ends Hair Memorial

Chef sadly announced this evening that his tonsorial standoff had come to a premature end when the New Orleans Saints placed hairman Steve Gleason on injured reserve for the 2007 season.

Until tonight, Chef had worked hard to achieve the Gleason coiffure as a yearlong appreciation gesture for #37's contributions on September 25, 2006 (see Chef's slow progress above).

If any Upper Terrace Who Dats are interested, Chef has a first edition of Carolyn Taylor's Home Haircuts and Styles for Men and Boys that he'd be willing to part with for $2.75.

Thursday, July 19, 2007

Today's Special: Vick's Head on a Plate

Chef wonders what would happen if Cafe 641 joined the realm of politics? Could a solid core of Upper Terrace Who Dats put a dent in Roger Goodell's hypocritical conscience?

Friday, July 06, 2007

Fashion Flare-up

While napping recently on the almost white sands of Alabama, Chef awoke to a sudden moment of fashion awareness. At first glance, he thought the bright light was from a flare-up at the offshore oil platform in the Gulf. Then, slowly, surely, a vision appeared:

A large, sparkly bow tie wrapped around the glamorous neck of a Cornel West/Andre 3000 offspring.

A full week later, when Chef realized his vision was a message from the Fleur d'Oracle, it all made sense. If Dhani Jones is the fashion replacement for Joe Horn, Chef says, "No thank you. Hollywood taught me all I know bout eye black." But if Mr. Jones initiates a youth bow-tie seminar at the Dryades YMCA, then Chef may find room in the Cafe to embrace a former Eagle. Also, it would be nice if he'd cough up the entire Philly offensive package prior to Dec. 23rd.

p.s. Chef knew Dhani looked familiar -- it's from his hosting of "Timeless" on MOJO HD.

(Thanks Saints Rant for the Dhani Jones personal website link).