Sunday, April 27, 2008

Grumpy Gal at the Grille

Nevermind Mickey Loomis' 6th round display of drafting wizardry to get a Wisconsin kicker. That was amazing, for sure. But, it doesn't set the Cafe afire.

Who Dats caught in the act of shameless Golden Spoon displays? Now, that's hot.

See Mike Hogan, bassist for Egg Yolk Jubilee, above.

Congrats on the new album, "Labor of Lunch." Your Ring of Fire cover "Grumpy Girl at the Grille" might very well become an Upper Terrace anthem by pre-season. And "Easy Meat" describes little Matthew Ryan to a T.

Sunday, April 20, 2008

From Cafe 641. With Love.

Chef has no business swimming in the NBA waters. Cafe 641's own, Jake Who Dat, has made that clear. And there's plenty of energy-filled Hornets rants already out there.

But, something happened yesterday while Chef was incognito in the Hive buying playoff beers for Section 320. And it makes me realize that everyone needs some love sometime. Especially old, senile, wealthy gentlemen.

So because of this . . .

followed by that . . .

. . . Chef offers all you Hornets fans this:

Your welcome.

Tuesday, April 15, 2008

Thanks NFL. Now Bite Me.

So imagine you're the NFL. And you really care about the city of New Orleans. How do you show your love?

You create a national stage for the re-opening of the Sacredome in 2006. Thank you.

Then you rob the fans of a home game by packing the Black & Gold overseas to London for a home game at the WembleyDome. S.O.I.

And then you feel a little bad about Upper Terrace Who Dats without the means to jump the pond. So you throw the Who Dats a bone.

A home opener with the Dead Parrot Poboys. Yeah?

A Monday evening visit from the norsemen. Yeah? And?

A Monday cheese dinner. Tasty.

A prime time Thursday night stage at Soldier Field to handle unfinished business. Awright now.

And a season-closing payback home game against the kittens. Word.

Schedule It.

Today at 1 p.m., CST, you have permission to make important life decisions regarding the remainder of your 2008 calendar year.

* Thinking about adding a baby to your household? Schedule it.
* Want to visit your aging grandma? Schedule it.
* Need to plan a wedding? Schedule it.
* Wavering on when you should take that much-deserved vacation? Schedule it.

And if it fits your lifestyle, schedule-release party eye black never goes out of style.

Monday, April 14, 2008

Beerman Tribute Deluxe

Last summer, Chef attempted a meager tribute to Michael "Beerman" Lewis. In retrospect, that homage doesn't even begin to touch the Beerman body of work that our Upper Terrace Who Dat, Ashley Morris, constructed. Saint 635 was buried in his Michael Lewis jersey. Dilly/Berto say we'll lay hands on his grave site before kicking off the 2008 season.

Deuce Upside Your Own Damn Head

S.O.I. (that's Upper Terrace talk for Suck On It) all you Deuce doubters. Look left. Know where that photo comes from? The New York Times. That means while we were losing our heads on January 13, 2007, the rest of the world saw Deuce lose his.

And now he's back this season. With two new knees. And a ring.

Chef was gonna go and do something crazy like join Elmwood Fitness if Benson didn't find some 2008 salary for Deuce. But now, it's all copacetic. Back to the Budweiser ellipticals. 276 hours til Draft Day.