Saturday, May 24, 2008

Pop Goes the Warner

In a moving display of family loyalty, Cafe 641 announced a petition drive to have its own Mr. Rita Benson-LeBlanc nominated as a Pop Warner All-American Little Scholar. Mr. Rita's commitment to football and cheerleading -- both activities that Pop Warner, Inc. proudly supports -- deserve recognition.

Let's compare the All-American criteria with Mr. Rita's resume:
All-American: is currently in grade 5 or higher
Mr. Rita: is definitely past grade 5

All-American: has a grade point average of 97% or higher
Mr. Rita: graded out at a 98.6% Superdome fan efficiency during the 2007 regular season

All-American: has a complete prior year's report card
Mr. Rita: has a complete 2007 report card, watermarked with an official Cafe 641 logo, and signed by Chef Who Dat

It's simple really. Mr. Rita's nomination was overlooked -- and possibly discarded -- due to his advanced age (27 years, give or take a year). And the solution is just as simple: Mr. Rita should receive a special invite to tonight's Pop Warner Little Scholars, Inc. awards banquet and receive distinction from his mentor, Ms. Rita Benson-Leblanc.

Here's what Ms. Rita Benson-LeBlanc said on Mr. Rita's behalf:
"Across America, Pop Warner is touching and enhancing many young lives, and I am thrilled to touch Mr. Rita on behalf of such an impactful organization."
Please support the Cafe's last-minute petition by adding your support of our candidate in our comments section.

1 comment:

saintseester said...

Yeah, but how are his grades on the snack run?